I’m not ready for my close up, Mr. DeMille.

I’ve been wearing the same breast-milk stained tank top for 3 days now. I really can’t tell you the last time I washed my hair and my skin is as soft and glowing as Clint Eastwoods’ after a long summer’s day. I am a mess. A barely awake, sleep deprived mom jonesing for a cup of coffee as a toddler grabs my leg and screams, “Mama, mama, juiiiiish!! Maaaaaama!!!”

I need a break.

In fact, I calmly told my fiance that if he didn’t take the girls out today he would find them drowned in the bathtub by the time he came back from getting the groceries. He asked me what we were going to do with so much free time.

OMG, relax. Put the phone down because I’m being sarcastic and CPS ain’t got no time for that. Besides, he understood my desperation and is taking them to the water park, HALLELOO.

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t going to get straight up crazy as soon as they walked out the door. I mean I might even take a whole 10 minute shower. Shit, I might even have another cup of coffee, IN BED, without two kids jumping on me every 2 seconds. I’m cuming just thinking of it.

So grab your cup of Joe and let’s cyber toast to a wonderful Sunday.

Live, laugh, love your bad ass kids, and man/woman who helps keep your sanity, every single day.

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